The Lemon Fool

Snorvey wrote:Ooh, on the subject of you tube videos. I didn't realise but in the comments section you can only use words like 'inspirational' 'amazing' 'hilarious' and so on. Youtubers exist only in a world of praise and inspirational phrases like the puke inducing 'love live laugh'.

Helpful comments like 'what a loada shite' are frowned upon at best and even a compliment like 'nice ass*' will have the youtube snowflake police berating you and eventually deleting you.

So there.

*it was a clip which contained a lassie feeding a donkey ok?

What's YouTrube?

AleisterCrowley wrote:Ideal for Glastonbury, avoids all that tent misery. Does it have a loo?

I thought it WAS the loo?

stevensfo wrote:I heard, many years ago, that the housebuilding companies used special smaller than average furniture when taking photos of the rooms to make the rooms appear bigger.

Admittedly, I have no idea if that is really true.

It's true, I did it myself when I was selling my cottage in Somerset - beautiful little place, quiet village location beside the 12th century church, but no rooms bigger than 12ft by 9, so smaller furniture had always been the way to go from the first day I moved in. But needs must. Got rid of my 7 foot sofa, replaced the comfy chairs with wicker and suchlike, downsized some of the pictures on the walls, painted the walls white to make them look bigger, and got the full asking price within two days. (With would-be gazumpers offering me more, although I declined.)

And the moral: It isn't deception if you're selling people what they want to see.

BJ

Snorvey wrote:even a compliment like 'nice ass*' will have the youtube snowflake police berating you and eventually deleting you. So there.

*it was a clip which contained a lassie feeding a donkey ok?

Which reminds me, gentlemen. Some decades ago, I used to write books and stuff for one of London's premier publishing outfits - and if there's one thing everybody knows about publishing offices, it's that they're a 90% female business. This being the right-on 1990s, it was all about girl power, and we blokes had to shut up and know our place.

Which wasn't too much of a burden really, because there aren't that many old-school neanderthal males in the book trade. But we were always curious about what really went on in the post room, which was run like a girls-only club, and there'd have been uproar if we'd dared to show our noses in there.

They were clearly having a good time in there, though, and we did wonder what was going on behind that door because they could get pretty loud on a Friday afternoon. And one day, we found out. The laughter was partially down to a couple of bottles of vino collapso which stood brazenly open on the desk. But the star attraction was a game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey, which apparently they'd been playing for weeks.

The thing was, it wasn't a donkey whose image had been pinned to the inside of the post room door. And it sure as hell wasn't a tail.

BJ

Snorvey wrote:Anyway, ANYWAY, so later on Im standing there taking a whizz and 2 (rather drunk) girls came into the screened off gents area, obviously looking for a toilet.

Or maybe they were looking to "pin the tail on the donkey"?

--kiloran

bungeejumper wrote:The thing was, it wasn't a donkey whose image had been pinned to the inside of the post room door. And it sure as hell wasn't a tail.

BJ

Inspired by Nick Bottom, the Weaver?

UncleEbenezer wrote:Inspired by Nick Bottom, the Weaver?

Aw, no, Bottom would have been too backward for those kinds of games. If he'd only been a bit more forward, he'd have got the part.

BJ

Snorvey wrote:...the toilets were probably a bit better than the festival standard, but by the late evening, the situation had gone downhill for the ladies at least. There just wasn't an adequate number of portaloos available to them.

...girls came into the screened off gents area, obviously looking for a toilet. It was pretty busy in there, but all the guys there shrugged their shoulders / ignored them

Took CC#2 to the Kingspan for the 2017 Womens World Cup Rugby. Demographic didn't match their normal expectations. So they ran out of draught cider. Coincidentally, there being a very limited supply of ladies' loos, the women started using the stalls in the gents' loos, at which no-one with a ticket batted an eyelid. But the stewards, once they noticed, went bananas. For reasons they couldn't elaborate, and I won't speculate.

Snorvey wrote:
It's tough being a bloke.

Not so much if all you want is a piss during a match.

Society despises men nowadays.

We have an unhealthy attitude towards food. Many suffer from food fetishism, it seems to have become a norm, people who measure the life well-lived by the number of gourmet meals that pass through their digestive systems. The MSM is full of recipes to tickle the palate, places to visit for that extra-special dining experience and the latest must-have ingredient or condiment. Social media seems to have a special place for those who like to show the world what they are about to eat as if it's a personal achievement. And some who don't want the trouble of food preparation or who cannot do it, tap an app to have it delivered and most of it, from what I've seen, is pimped-up rubbish with a side of something that's surely not good for you.

We don't care or don't know how the meat that we eat arrives at the supermarket or butchers, we don't want to know what a slaughterhouse looks like and how meat is prepared by 'food' processors. Nor do we want to know about the animal-suffering that takes place up and down the country even in establishments that produce products that the supermarkets are content to label in a way that suggests the wholesomeness of the farm and the production system. Then there's the environmental consequences of our food choices but which is a subject best put to one side for the purpose of this Unpopular Opinion.

But there seems to an element of 'culinary karma' at work, what we eat is killing us by degree. Obesity, diabetes, heart disease and other ailments don't appear on the bill, but we're still paying for them. Bon appétit!

RC

ReformedCharacter wrote:...the environmental consequences of our food choices ..

I recommend a nice plump squirrel.
Especially if it's just been on the bird table eating their specially curated food grrr.

Ideally, one per serving. Bit of a sacrifice for the squirrel of course.

V8

88V8 wrote:

ReformedCharacter wrote:...the environmental consequences of our food choices ..

I recommend a nice plump squirrel.
Especially if it's just been on the bird table eating their specially curated food grrr.

Ideally, one per serving. Bit of a sacrifice for the squirrel of course.

V8

Deep fried, a favourite of Elvis Presley apparently. I always go for the grey ones as there seems to be a shortage of the reds, maybe there's a shortage of delivery drivers or perhaps it's a Brexit thing.

RC

ReformedCharacter wrote:

88V8 wrote:

ReformedCharacter wrote:...the environmental consequences of our food choices ..

I recommend a nice plump squirrel.
Especially if it's just been on the bird table eating their specially curated food grrr.
Ideally, one per serving. Bit of a sacrifice for the squirrel of course.

Deep fried, a favourite of Elvis Presley apparently. I always go for the grey ones as there seems to be a shortage of the reds, maybe there's a shortage of delivery drivers or perhaps it's a Brexit thing.

Me too with the greys.
Remember to remove the airgun pellet before serving.

What do you do with the tails? Other than a fly whisk.

V8

88V8 wrote:

ReformedCharacter wrote:

88V8 wrote:

ReformedCharacter wrote:...the environmental consequences of our food choices ..

I recommend a nice plump squirrel.
Especially if it's just been on the bird table eating their specially curated food grrr.
Ideally, one per serving. Bit of a sacrifice for the squirrel of course.

Deep fried, a favourite of Elvis Presley apparently. I always go for the grey ones as there seems to be a shortage of the reds, maybe there's a shortage of delivery drivers or perhaps it's a Brexit thing.

Me too with the greys.
Remember to remove the airgun pellet before serving.

What do you do with the tails? Other than a fly whisk.

V8

I tie a bit of string to them and then use them as pull-throughs to keep my shotgun barrels nice and clean.

RC

ReformedCharacter wrote:I tie a bit of string to them and then use them as pull-throughs to keep my shotgun barrels nice and clean.

The tail or the whole squirrel?
If the latter, what earth is your gun - a 4-bore?
Perhaps you could train live squirrels to eat the powder residue as they slither along.

88V8 wrote:What do you do with the tails? Other than a fly whisk.
V8

For tying Salmon flies. Although I have never worked out how a Salmon could have obtained a taste for squirrels.

scotia wrote:

88V8 wrote:What do you do with the tails? Other than a fly whisk.
V8

For tying Salmon flies. Although I have never worked out how a Salmon could have obtained a taste for squirrels.

Squirrels?
Wouldn't put anything past that dirty wee bestert!

...oh! Salmon was it?
Sorry.
As you were

-sd

but for the advent of covid:-

Trump would have been re-elected
Boris would be miles ahead in the opinion poles

Opinions are a matter of opinion

I employed a man to do some 12hrs work. When he finished I thanked him. He said " no, I must thank you for giving me the work "

When I or members of my family eventually get to see a doctor or a nurse we always thank them, naturally. They should be thanking us and people like us for giving them so much extremely well paid work.

I think I'd be a bit uncertain if a doctor thanked me
What for.... getting ill

I do thank anyone I see doing a decent thing
but I don't need to be thanked just for doing my routine job