Snogging - betrayal or not?

[zico]

On a hopefully lighter subject, Strictly "stars" Seann Walsh and Katya Jones have been pictured snogging in the street and have apologised saying it was just a one-off mistake because they'd had too much to drink. Seann has a long-time girlfriend, and Katya is married to another Strictly dancer.

Do you think their behaviour is relationship-ending, nothing to worry about, or something in-between?

[redsturgeon]

On a hopefully lighter subject, Strictly "stars" Seann Walsh and Katya Jones have been pictured snogging in the street and have apologised saying it was just a one-off mistake because they'd had too much to drink. Seann has a long-time girlfriend, and Katya is married to another Strictly dancer.

Do you think their behaviour is relationship-ending, nothing to worry about, or something in-between?

Not sure many relationships would be left intact if a quick snog was automatically relationship ending...it doesn't say much for the strength of the relationship.

As for being nothing to worry about, that depends, will it stop there or continue?

Strictly has a history of this sort of thing and should we be surprised with dancing being, "the vertical expression of horizontal desire". Put two people in close physical proximity over a sustained period of time with a common goal, sharing the physical and psychological ups and downs and the endorphin rush of success and failure and you have a built in recipe for romantic attachment.

John

[Clariman]

Put two people in close physical proximity over a sustained period of time with a common goal, sharing the physical and psychological ups and downs and the endorphin rush of success and failure and you have a built in recipe for romantic attachment.

John

Sounds as if you are talking from personal experience there John!

[Howyoudoin]

Put two people in close physical proximity over a sustained period of time with a common goal, sharing the physical and psychological ups and downs and the endorphin rush of success and failure and you have a built in recipe for romantic attachment.

John

Sounds as if you are talking from personal experience there John!

It was more this sentence from John that I was worried about . . .

Not sure many relationships would be left intact if a quick snog was automatically relationship ending...it doesn't say much for the strength of the relationship.

I'd look at it the other way around. It doesn't say much for the strength of the relationship if you think that snogging other people is 'ok'. Things very rarely end at just snogging. Especially when alcohol is involved.


HYD

[vrdiver]

a one-off mistake because they'd had too much to drink.

That excuse implies that the next time they have one too many, it's likely to happen again. Not a great basis for a trusting relationship at home.

As others have said, the regime of Strictly, putting two people together in close proximity with lots of physical and emotional intensity, is a breeding ground for romance. If either dancer had a weak relationship at home, then this is a recipe for an affair which would take quite a bit of self discipline to resist.

I'd expect the professional dancers to have something in their contract along the lines of "don't bring the show into disrepute". They'd also, I would hope, be much more used to the regime and less influenced by it, so better able to behave professionally.

Imagine, your partner is invited to take part in the next series and the papers are reporting say, 25% of celebs are getting off with their dance partner... how supportive and delighted would you be? What impact would such controversy have on the acceptance rate for any serious celeb (as opposed to a kiss-and-tell)? I suspect the BBC would be quite hostile to such relationships where there was a partner of either of the dancers likely to be hurt (not necessarily a moral judgment, more of an image issue).

VRD

[redsturgeon]

Put two people in close physical proximity over a sustained period of time with a common goal, sharing the physical and psychological ups and downs and the endorphin rush of success and failure and you have a built in recipe for romantic attachment.

John

Sounds as if you are talking from personal experience there John!

Possibly since one builds up a substantial repertoire of experience with age but also from a professional standpoint as a psychology graduate and trained counsellor.

John

[Clariman]

It is also possible that it was staged, to get people talking about them . Probably won't damage their chances of winning.

[redsturgeon]

It was more this sentence from John that I was worried about . . .

Not sure many relationships would be left intact if a quick snog was automatically relationship ending...it doesn't say much for the strength of the relationship.

I'd look at it the other way around. It doesn't say much for the strength of the relationship if you think that snogging other people is 'ok'. Things very rarely end at just snogging. Especially when alcohol is involved.


HYD

I have lost count of the number of "quick snogs" I have had in my life and I can assure you that most of those went no further. I think that a serious long term relationship ought to be strong enough to withstand any momentary physical interaction between two consenting adults as long as the intent was not to weaken or end said relationship.

I understand also that as someone embarking on a serious relationship relatively recently your view may vary but give it seven years or perhaps seventeen and things may change, difficult though that may be to imagine now.

John

[vrdiver]

I understand also that as someone embarking on a serious relationship relatively recently your view may vary but give it seven years or perhaps seventeen and things may change, difficult though that may be to imagine now.

Well, having given it 26 years and counting, I beg to differ...

VRD

[Howyoudoin]

I have lost count of the number of "quick snogs" I have had in my life and I can assure you that most of those went no further.

The implication being that some of them did go further?

I think that a serious long term relationship ought to be strong enough to withstand any momentary physical interaction between two consenting adults as long as the intent was not to weaken or end said relationship.

And that's what your wife thinks too presumably?

I understand also that as someone embarking on a serious relationship relatively recently your view may vary but give it seven years or perhaps seventeen and things may change, difficult though that may be to imagine now.

A little condescending but i'll let it ride and see what other Snuggers think of that statement.


HYD

[redsturgeon]

I have lost count of the number of "quick snogs" I have had in my life and I can assure you that most of those went no further.

The implication being that some of them did go further?

Possibly

I think that a serious long term relationship ought to be strong enough to withstand any momentary physical interaction between two consenting adults as long as the intent was not to weaken or end said relationship.

And that's what your wife thinks too presumably?

Yes

I understand also that as someone embarking on a serious relationship relatively recently your view may vary but give it seven years or perhaps seventeen and things may change, difficult though that may be to imagine now.

A little condescending but i'll let it ride and see what other Snuggers think of that statement.

Apologies, it was not my intention, merely a reflection of my own thinking during the first flush of romantic relationships.


HYD

[GrandOiseau]

Yesterday was my 13th wedding anniversary and we'd been together 5 years when we got married.

I've never snogged another woman in all that time and I am certain my wife hasn't either.

So for me, yes it's a betrayal.

[redsturgeon]

I've never snogged another woman in all that time and I am certain my wife hasn't either.

Is that what you meant to say?

John

[Howyoudoin]

I have lost count of the number of "quick snogs" I have had in my life and I can assure you that most of those went no further.

The implication being that some of them did go further?

Possibly

I think that a serious long term relationship ought to be strong enough to withstand any momentary physical interaction between two consenting adults as long as the intent was not to weaken or end said relationship.

And that's what your wife thinks too presumably?

Yes

I understand also that as someone embarking on a serious relationship relatively recently your view may vary but give it seven years or perhaps seventeen and things may change, difficult though that may be to imagine now.

A little condescending but i'll let it ride and see what other Snuggers think of that statement.

Apologies, it was not my intention, merely a reflection of my own thinking during the first flush of romantic relationships.


HYD

Someone looking in from the outside might presume from the above that you are saying that you've had affairs and your wife is ok with that fact? If you are also ok with your wife doing the same, then I think that constitutes what some call 'an open relationship'?

Either way, I would say it is unusual for one or both partners to be ok with the other having sex with other people.


HYD

[bungeejumper]

I'm confused. What is this "Strictly"? Is it time they thought of giving it another name?

BJ

[redsturgeon]

The implication being that some of them did go further?

Possibly



And that's what your wife thinks too presumably?

Yes



A little condescending but i'll let it ride and see what other Snuggers think of that statement.

Apologies, it was not my intention, merely a reflection of my own thinking during the first flush of romantic relationships.


HYD

Someone looking in from the outside might presume from the above that you are saying that you've had affairs and your wife is ok with that fact? If you are also ok with your wife doing the same, then I think that constitutes what some call 'an open relationship'?

Either way, I would say it is unusual for one or both partners to be ok with the other having sex with other people.


HYD

I think that is quite a leap.

I am now 62, I have been married more than once and had long term relationships also. What may have happened in the past may have happened in parallel or in series and may or may not be happening now. I think I have said enough about my personal relationships.

John

[Howyoudoin]

On a hopefully lighter subject . . .

Things never turn out as they seem, do they?




HYD

[AndyPandy]

I'd expect the professional dancers to have something in their contract along the lines of "don't bring the show into disrepute".

I suspect the BBC would be quite hostile to such relationships where there was a partner of either of the dancers likely to be hurt (not necessarily a moral judgment, more of an image issue).

VRD

Hmmm...

As PT Barnum allegedly said, "There's no such thing as bad publicity".

[Howyoudoin]

It is also possible that it was staged, to get people talking about them . Probably won't damage their chances of winning.

I think you're affording this particular couple too much credit.

In both the former and the latter statements!

:-p

HYD

[AleisterCrowley]

I recall reading Frank Skinner's autobiography
A tabloid offered him and his then-girlfriend a free holiday in the West Indies - in return they had to agree to being photographed 'paparazzi style' walking along beach etc.
So at least some of these photos are staged...