Mine (and your) Room101 exhibits

[OLTB]

Morning all

Following on from AleisterCrowley's comment on the 'Its shopping, Jim...' post, where he said this:

I tell you what annoys me *
These young people walking around with "Ramones" and "Paul's Boutique" T-shirts
Do they know who the Ramones were? I have they ever listened to "Paul's Boutique" ?
Oooh, it's annoying.

*about 1,000 things at the moment, I could list them, but will not.

I thought, hmm, what annoys me and what would I groan at if I had to enter Room101 (my Winston Smith moment). Off the top of my head (but with the freedom to add more if I choose to!) my top (and very petty) five would be:

1. 'Living' statues - I suppose it's more the crowd that gathers and remarks, 'oooh, isn't it clever'. No, it's not clever, someone has painted themselves one colour and is standing or sitting still. A professor of something is clever.

2. People who say Crimbo (for Christmas) or Hollybobs (for holiday).

3. People who close their eyes when they're talking to you.

4. People (mainly young'uns) who say, 'can I get' when ordering something.

5. People who serve you in a shop but are talking either on the phone, or to a colleague, whilst ignoring the person buying the thing that keeps them in that job.

I'd love to hear any others...

Cheers, OLTB.

[Watis]

Your number 4 winds me up too.

From me you can add:

- 'Ten items or less'.

- People who start sentences with 'So . . .'

- TV presenters who . . . insert pauses into each sentence . . . ending with a bigger pause . . . before the last . . . . . two words! Just speak normally, chaps.

- People dressed in giant foam cartoon character costumes.

Watis

[tea42]

Folk who sit in parked cars glued to their phones whilst the engine is idling pumping out fumes and deadly particles. (An offence under the Road Traffic Act)

Pavement parkers

[GrandOiseau]

Not original I know but.... people who litter.

[jfgw]

Three times more;
Three times less.

Both of these are grammatically correct but are usually used to mean "three times as many" and "one third as much" respectively.

"Three times more" means "four times as much" or "four times as many".

Likewise, if the old one lasted one week and the new one lasts six times longer, the new one lasts seven weeks.

If something cost £30 last year but is now three times less, you should be paid £60 to take it away. If it actually now costs £10, that is only two-thirds less.

Julian F. G. W.

[gryffron]

Super quick cut editing. Modern trend used in film and TV shows and every Channel 4 documentary. Cuts so fast you can't actually focus on any individual image. Often used during a show as a cheap substitute for properly arranged action sequences, or as adverts for a show because they somehow think this will make me want to watch their fare.
Oh, and the constantly moving swirling camera used in the Star Trek - young'uns films. That just makes me sick

Caravans. No, make that all other traffic.

Dogs. Endless noise and leave their stuff everywhere.

4. People (mainly young'uns) who say, 'can I get' when ordering something.

Don't go to California then. It is a universal there. Even for old folks. No doubt disseminated to the rest of the English speaking world via Hollywood

Gryff

[robbelg]

Shops that are heated for the comfort of staff in shirt sleeves not customers in coats.


Rob

[OLTB]

- People who start sentences with 'So . . .'

Yes! I love listening to the 'In Our Time' podcast with Melvyn Bragg, but the number of academics on there that start their remarks with, "So, …." arghhhh!

Cheers, OLTB.

[swill453]

People who grump in the snug when there's a perfectly good other place designed specifically for it...



Scott.

[zico]

People who cut corners on roads and go across the white line, when they can see another car is approaching them.
Politicians who claim to "refute" things (or even "strongly refute") simply by saying "I deny it".
People who take a ridiculously long time at an airport check-in desk.
People who think the purpose of aisles in planes/trains is to give them somewhere to stretch out.
Halogen headlights on cars (usually 4x4's).
Parents/grandparents who smile happily when their child screams/squeals loudly in a confined public space.
"Mother and baby" car spaces being seen as equivalent to Disabled bays.

[zico]

People who grump in the snug when there's a perfectly good other place designed specifically for it...

Another one. People who are in the right and you can't deny it!

[OLTB]

People who grump in the snug when there's a perfectly good other place designed specifically for it...



Scott.

Yes, I was wondering if Bitter Lemons were a more appropriate board, but think it worthwhile pub 'banter'. If a mod thinks it's better moved then that'll be number six on my list

Cheers, OLTB.

[stewamax]

'can I get

I agree, but the politer alternatives are also ambiguous.
The pedantic response to "Please may I have..." would be "Yes - you have my permission...".
And the response to "I want ...." would be "Indeed - thank you for letting me know"

Even forms with a transitive verb such as "I would like to buy..." or (the awkward) "I would like you to sell me ..." have a similar snag.

The blunt "Sell me this XYZ please" is correct - it is a request rather than an expression of feeling - but is not the very "Could I possibly trouble you to sell me this XYZ if is isn't too inconvenient" British way. We are just too wretchedly polite!

[UncleEbenezer]

People who grump in the snug when there's a perfectly good other place designed specifically for it...



Scott.

People who mistake purposes. There's a place for proper grumps, where they deserve and get their own threads. This thread was posted explicitly to provoke pub goers to come up with me-too grumps, which is a subtly different purpose.

... at which you are of course welcome to grump. Ho, hum.

[bungeejumper]

Being addressed as "you guys" when I'm out shopping with the wife. In fact, the whole "you guys" thing, especially when it's addressed to a group of females. WTF?

BJ

Late news: I gather that "you guys" is now in the sights of the gender-fluid and trans communities, because (according to them) it attributes a penis to women even though they may have already had theirs removed. (Work it out for yourself...) Sometimes I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

[OLTB]

Late news: I gather that "you guys" is now in the sights of the gender-fluid and trans communities, because (according to them) it attributes a penis to women even though they may have already had theirs removed. (Work it out for yourself...) Sometimes I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

How bizarre - I'm not too sure why Mrs OLTB would want to have a penis attributed to her but I might ask her tonight to see if she would be offended or not

Cheers, OLTB.

[AleisterCrowley]

'can I get

I agree, but the politer alternatives are also ambiguous.
The pedantic response to "Please may I have..." would be "Yes - you have my permission...".
And the response to "I want ...." would be "Indeed - thank you for letting me know"

Even forms with a transitive verb such as "I would like to buy..." or (the awkward) "I would like you to sell me ..." have a similar snag.

The blunt "Sell me this XYZ please" is correct - it is a request rather than an expression of feeling - but is not the very "Could I possibly trouble you to sell me this XYZ if is isn't too inconvenient" British way. We are just too wretchedly polite!

"Can I have a large tea please" works for me, even if it's not 100% 'correct'
I fear we are stuck with "can I get" - which is acceptable in American English, often with also tagged on the end;
"Can I get a plate of grits also?"
I've no idea what grits are, but I'm sure they're awful.

[GoSeigen]

1. Misuse of personal pronouns.

GS

[OLTB]

1. Misuse of personal pronouns.

GS

Ha ha! Best one of the day

What a clot...

I will write out 100 times 'My'...

Cheers, OLTB.

[Howyoudoin]

Shops that are heated for the comfort of staff in shirt sleeves not customers in coats.


Rob

You want shops to be the same temperature inside as the outside in Winter (or any other time)?




HYD