A man walks into a pet store...

[Itsallaguess]

A man walks into a pet store.

He tells the attendant that he is looking for something a little different, “Everyone has dogs and cats and birds and fish, I want something out of the ordinary please”

The attendant says “I've got just the thing, here, we have a talking centipede”

“Perfect" says the man, "That sounds great, I'll take one of those please”

He gets the centipede home and of course he's keen to show his new pet off. He looks at him and says “Mr. Centipede, would you like to go down the pub and have a couple of beers?”

The man gets no response.

Maybe he is a little shaken up from the ride home he thinks. I’ll give him 10 minutes and ask again....

10 minutes later the man says “How are you doing, would you like head down the pub for a beer?

Again no response.

The man thinks to himself - I'll give him another 15 minutes, and if he still doesn’t reply I’m taking him back....

15 minutes later the man says to the centipede “Come on little fella, do you want to go down the pub for a beer or not?!”

The centipede replies “Will you hang on for God's sake! I'm putting my shoes on, you impatient bugger!”

Itsallaguess

[csearle]

Groan.

[UncleEbenezer]

Groan.

Sometimes you just have to admit defeet.

[DrFfybes]

A man goes into a pet shop and says "I want to buy a bee".
"A Bee?, we don't sell bees"
"Why not, you've got one in the window"

[redsturgeon]

Man walks into a pet shop and sees a newt on the shoulder of the shopkeeper.

"He's nice" he says, "What's his name?"

"Tiny"

"Nice name, why do you call him that?"

"Because he's my newt"

John

[AleisterCrowley]