You're now married - so get at it

[stewamax]

The Times today 11th June describes a wedding at which Turkish President Erdogan was best man.
In his best man's speech, he warned the assembled guests and happy couple against using contraception and urged them to have at least three children and ideally four.
In a previous wedding ceremony in 2014 he described the use of contraception as 'treason', for which the punishment is life imprisonment although Erdogan wants to restore the death penalty. Perhaps he was joking; or ...

[In passing, the C of E formerly used much stronger meat that present day congregations can take. The uncompromisingly direct language of the Book of Common Prayer (1662) - which is still canonically valid although the clergy don't like it - says that marriage “is not by any to be enterprised, nor taken in hand,unadvisedly, lightly, or wantonly, to satisfy men's carnal lusts and appetites, like brute beasts that have no understanding; but … duly considering the causes for which Matrimony was ordained. First, It was ordained for the procreation of children …..Secondly, It was ordained for a remedy against sin, and to avoid fornication…”]

[UncleIan]

First, It was ordained for the procreation of children …..Secondly... to avoid fornication…

Well I'm confused. Which is it?

Or, if you're married long enough, you'll avoid fornication?

[stewamax]

Or, if you're married long enough, you'll avoid fornication?

If you live long enough you will lose the enthusiasm and - later - even the ability to fornicate. Unless of course you were Lord Palmerston who at the age of 78 was cited for adultery in a divorce case, and (apocryphally) died while enjoying the pleasures of a serving maid on his billiard table.

[StepOne]

...Lord Palmerston who at the age of 78 was cited for adultery in a divorce case, and (apocryphally) died while enjoying the pleasures of a serving maid on his billiard table.

Hope he didn't go in-off.

[UncleIan]

...Lord Palmerston who at the age of 78 was cited for adultery in a divorce case, and (apocryphally) died while enjoying the pleasures of a serving maid on his billiard table.

Hope he didn't go in-off.

Trying to sink the pink presumably.

Oh no, wait, billiards, that'll be two white balls on the table.

[stewamax]

Trying to sink the pink presumably. Oh no, wait, billiards, that'll be two white balls on the table.

Palmerston was famed for his steady cueing action and in difficult positions would even use a full-butt long rest.