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Words of wisdom

Laughter is the best medicine, find and post jokes. nothing too saucy please, Dad jokes, Current news jokes..
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laladonny
Lemon Pip
Posts: 59
Joined: November 18th, 2016, 12:03 am

Words of wisdom

#259535

Postby laladonny » October 22nd, 2019, 11:07 pm

I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy ice cream, and that's close enough.

Never, ever, ever trust anyone who says "Trust Me".

A lost property office is for people to return things they find and don't want.

If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

An agreeable person is someone who agrees with you.

People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them that Benjamin Franklin said it first.

It hurts to be on the cutting edge.

I considered atheism but there weren't enough holidays.

I plan on living forever. So far, so good.

If it weren't for me, there'd just be a pile of my clothes on the floor.

Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred.

Stare at people. It's cheap entertainment.

Dod101
Lemon Quarter
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Joined: October 10th, 2017, 11:33 am
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Re: Words of wisdom

#259538

Postby Dod101 » October 22nd, 2019, 11:17 pm

The only one that is at all serious is

Never, ever, trust people who say ''Trust me''.

I'd go along with that.

Dod

AsleepInYorkshire
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Joined: February 7th, 2017, 9:36 pm
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Re: Words of wisdom

#259547

Postby AsleepInYorkshire » October 22nd, 2019, 11:37 pm

Dod101 wrote:The only one that is at all serious is

Never, ever, trust people who say ''Trust me''.

I'd go along with that.

Dod

In all honesty you can trust me :roll:

AiY


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