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Self-defence

Laughter is the best medicine, find and post jokes. nothing too saucy please, Dad jokes, Current news jokes..
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brightncheerful
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Self-defence

#295965

Postby brightncheerful » March 31st, 2020, 9:28 am

When shopping in Waitrose I ensure people stay at least two meters away from me by holding a Tesco carrier bag at all times.
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stewamax
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Re: Self-defence

#296059

Postby stewamax » March 31st, 2020, 12:14 pm

:lol:
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Watis
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Re: Self-defence

#296067

Postby Watis » March 31st, 2020, 12:32 pm

That asda be the joke of the month! :lol:
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dabyzd119
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Re: Self-defence

#296069

Postby dabyzd119 » March 31st, 2020, 12:35 pm

Aldi-cide that!
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Itsallaguess
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Re: Self-defence

#296071

Postby Itsallaguess » March 31st, 2020, 12:39 pm

This just adds Morrisons as to why we should always carry a Tesco carrier bag, I suppose...

Cheers!

Itsallaguess
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stewamax
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Re: Self-defence

#296161

Postby stewamax » March 31st, 2020, 3:41 pm

... but only a lidl one...
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UncleEbenezer
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Re: Self-defence

#296209

Postby UncleEbenezer » March 31st, 2020, 5:24 pm

brightncheerful wrote:When shopping in Waitrose I ensure people stay at least two meters away from me by holding a Tesco carrier bag at all times.

Every lidl helps?
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Itsallaguess
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Re: Self-defence

#296211

Postby Itsallaguess » March 31st, 2020, 5:40 pm

Looks like we're not Budgen on these supermarket jokes then....

Cheers!

Itsallaguess
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AsleepInYorkshire
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Re: Self-defence

#296212

Postby AsleepInYorkshire » March 31st, 2020, 5:43 pm

Booker hell 8-)

AiYn'U
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Itsallaguess
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Re: Self-defence

#296216

Postby Itsallaguess » March 31st, 2020, 5:48 pm

Don't forget, we should avoid social contact as much as we can when we travel to these places..

So that probably rules out walking, or the bus, and probably the train....

I think we should be all right to take Ocado...

(I'll get my coat...)

Itsallaguess
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Gaggsy
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Re: Self-defence

#296240

Postby Gaggsy » March 31st, 2020, 7:23 pm

Itsallaguess wrote:I think we should be all right to take Ocado...

Aha! That's what you need a Carrefour!
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panamagold
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Re: Self-defence

#296245

Postby panamagold » March 31st, 2020, 7:37 pm

You see the gags we can summon up when we are all being Co-operative.
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stevensfo
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Re: Self-defence

#296269

Postby stevensfo » March 31st, 2020, 8:46 pm

So for some real relaxation, maybe we should treat ourselves to a few hours in a Spar?
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panamagold
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Re: Self-defence

#296276

Postby panamagold » March 31st, 2020, 9:14 pm

stevensfo wrote:So for some real relaxation, maybe we should treat ourselves to a few hours in a Spar?


I know one where you can spend as many hours as you like between 7-11
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Bminusrob
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Re: Self-defence

#296402

Postby Bminusrob » April 1st, 2020, 9:20 am

I am sorry. There's no Safeway.
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marronier
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Re: Self-defence

#296413

Postby marronier » April 1st, 2020, 9:40 am

Keep'em coming. You'll Wal-Marts everywhere.
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brightncheerful
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Re: Self-defence

#297278

Postby brightncheerful » April 3rd, 2020, 10:39 am

Hardly anyone in the Booths today.
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