The Lemon Fool

From somewhere on YouTube:
A plane is being boarded
- “Good morning ladies and gentlemen, welcome to this Boeing XYZ”
- at which point the passengers shrieked “Help” and started to disembark again, apart from one man who remained seated
- the others asked “Didn’t you hear? This is a Boeing XYZ”?
- man calmly replied “Yes – I used to work for Boeing; this one will never even leave the ground

Boeing?

Ah yes, I remember them....

"If its Boeing, I'm not going!


A Boeing 777 was flying from New York to Paris when it encountered some heavy turbulence over the Atlantic. The captain has a decade of flying under his belt and manages to get through the turbulence without any major incidents.

He then switches on the intercom and says, “This is your captain speaking. Sorry for the bumpy ride but the worst is behind us. We should have smooth journey from now on”. The captain forgets to switch off intercom, and turns to co-pilot and says, “Phew, that was exhausting. I could use a hot coffee and a bl**job right now”. This was of course heard by all the passengers in the cabin.

The head stewardess quickly starts making her way to the cockpit to inform the captain of his folly. Seeing this, one of the passengers called after her, “Don’t forget the coffee!”