Donate to Remove ads

Got a credit card? use our Credit Card & Finance Calculators

Thanks to eyeball08,Wondergirly,bofh,johnstevens77,Bhoddhisatva, for Donating to support the site

Strange disease

Laughter is the best medicine, find and post jokes. nothing too saucy please, Dad jokes, Current news jokes..
Forum rules
Material posted here that is disparaging towards any group on the basis of race, faith, nationality, gender, disability or sexual orientation will be deleted and any poster of such material risks suspension.
sg31
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 1543
Joined: November 4th, 2016, 11:35 am
Has thanked: 925 times
Been thanked: 708 times

Strange disease

#109265

Postby sg31 » January 10th, 2018, 5:09 pm

While in China, a New York businessman is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom all the time he is there.

A week after arriving back home, in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots.

Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.

The man returns, a couple of days later, and the doctor says, 'I've got bad news for you, you've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here. We know very little about it.'

The man looks a little perplexed and says, 'Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc.'

The doctor answers, 'I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis.'

The man screams in horror, 'Absolutely not! I want a second opinion.' The doctor replies, 'Well, it's your choice. Go ahead, if you want, but surgery is your only choice.'

The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'll know more about the disease.

The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims, 'Ah, yes, Mongowyian VD. Vewy ware disease.'


The guy says to the doctor, 'Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can we do? My American doctor wants to operate and amputate my penis!'

The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs. 'Stupid Amerlican docttah, always want to opawate. Make more money dat way. No need to amputate!'

Oh, Thank God!' the man replies.

'Yes!' says the Chinese doctor, 'Wait two weeks. Faw off by itself!'

stewamax
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 2456
Joined: November 7th, 2016, 2:40 pm
Has thanked: 84 times
Been thanked: 798 times

Re: Strange disease

#109287

Postby stewamax » January 10th, 2018, 6:42 pm

...when it could be the piquant ingredient of some chef's special dish.
De gustibus non est disputandum.

stevensfo
Lemon Quarter
Posts: 3485
Joined: November 5th, 2016, 8:43 am
Has thanked: 3867 times
Been thanked: 1418 times

Re: Strange disease

#109330

Postby stevensfo » January 10th, 2018, 10:29 pm

'Yes!' says the Chinese doctor, 'Wait two weeks. Faw off by itself!'


Wow! First heard sometime back in the 80s! Dontcha love nostalgia.


Meanwhile:

Grandad: My sister drowned in a pond. Very sad!

Me: Oh my God, that's terrible!

Grandad: Not really. If she'd floated, we would have had to burn her!



Steve


Return to “Laughing Lemons”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 26 guests