What to wear?

[neversay]

What's the classic wardrobe for a (tall thin-ish) guy in his mid-forties?

Time to face facts: I have got two modes - smart (black suits, blue shirts) and scruffy (jeans, t-shirt, fleece) but rather useless at anything in-between. I need a very simple/easy/minimalist smart-casual wardrobe to blend in, not stand out (here and in the US). So two DAK 'direct answer' questions:

1. Is there a simple style guide anyone can recommend?
2. Is there a particular store (or stores) where I should shop?

I say that as someone who hates shopping and isn't interested in clothes in the slightest, but I do need to sharpen up and I recognise that I need help.

Any tips gratefully received!

N.

[Watis]

For over 20 years I have used the online and catalogue shop Lands' End who have a varied selection of casual and smart casual clothing.

There always seems to be a sale of some kind on so if you can bide your time you can usually avoid buying clothes at the full price.

There is a an outlet store for seconds and end of lines in Rutland. There used to be one in Hatfield but that may have closed now - it's not on their website any more.

HTH,

No connection.

Watis

[Itsallaguess]

What's the classic wardrobe for a (tall thin-ish) guy in his mid-forties?

You might get some better responses that you prefer, but as a fall-back position then I don't think you'll ever go wrong with a simple 'shirt-under-jumper' combination, which can look both smart and casual enough for most non-work occasions -



Link to original source, with some other examples - https://tinyurl.com/ybgnnc7n

Cheers,

Itsallaguess

[Slarti]

For me it is, in summer, polo shirt with a breast pocket, for the phone, together with light cargo pants.

In winter I switch to long sleeved shirts.

I have to say, I've never had a black suit. Never even considered it as an option.

Slarti

[Dod101]

The simple answer; get a wife if you have not got one. But I find Lands End good as someone else has just said. Not too expensive but decent quality. On an overseas trip recently I took with me and wore quite a lot a simple non creasing lightweight jacket. Very useful for carrying things and smart/casual when necessary.

Dod

[stewamax]

get a wife if you have not got one

Not necessarily the best value-for-money option, especially when she plumps for an outfit you wouldn't be seen dead in...

[neversay]

Many thanks for all the helpful replies. I do have a wife and she's badgering me to go clothes shopping (uggh) but I want to have an idea about what style I'm seeking for beforehand - hence the DAK. When I have tried the styles she likes, I feel uncomfortable/self-conscious and drift back to jeans just as soon as I can get away with it.

I like the idea of Pinterest for styles and shopping online from somewhere like Lands End which looks good. I guess a 'mix and match' set of chinos, polo and button-down shirts, light v-neck sweater and a non-creasing jacket is the target - plus some shoes (another problem!). The trick is finding a combination that works for me rather than the male models my wife notices.

[didds]

Then only advice I could think of is what do other men (maybe with a similar builod etc) wear that when you see it YOU think "oh, that looks good" ? Ultimately its about YOU feeling comfortable and happy in what you wear [ if we ALL here said deffo a lilac dress with red high heels, would you be coofrtable wearing that in public, despite it being a universal suggestion etc ? Silly exapmple that I hope proves the point etc ]

Then shop for that style stuff.

Or - continually trawl charity shops and buy what you think looks "good". If it doesn't work you haven't just wasted £50 on a pair of trousers or £30 on a shirt that you actually don't end up liking.

didds

[neversay]

Thanks @didds. I agree. I'm a bit on the spectrum for 'form over function' so generally disinterested in clothes. You'd think by my age that I would have my own style by now, but I always find other things more interesting instead.

[tjh290633]

Since I stopped working, my wardrobe has consisted of jackets and trousers, plus supplementary outer wear, raincoat, waterproof jacket, light jacket and fleece.

Add to that a DJ, morning suit if you do a lot of weddings or go to the Palace frequently, and a suit for funerals unless you go for the informal look.

No T-shirts, just ordinary shirts with long and short sleeves, all with breast pockets. You may find headgear useful as hair cover decreases.

Don't pay stupid money for ordinary clothes.

TJH

[Itsallaguess]

I'm a bit on the spectrum for 'form over function' so generally disinterested in clothes.

I've often wondered why, on a chest of drawers, they don't make some 'mens drawers' that are about 2 inches deep....

I tend to find that with the 6-inch deep drawers that I tend to fold my clothes into, I rarely delve under the second layer of clothes anyway, unless it's some sort of social-event emergency that requires special clothing-attention....

It's the same with my wardrobe. If I'm looking left or right from my favourite middle-five hangers, then something's definitely going down that's out of the ordinary....I think they should make a blokes quiz show on what's at the bottom of their clothes drawers, and on the furthest left and right hangers in their wardrobes. I would expect really quite low scoring overall....

I do like didd's idea of 'actively people watching' for a while, to get a feel for what you think looks good/nice on blokes of a similar age and build. You've mentioned feeling comfortable with any potential 'look' a few times now in this thread, so if you end up buying and wearing something similar to something that you've already seen looks good on a similar age and build of person, then it's likely to help with that particular self-conciousness issue, hopefully.

It's probably not an activity that would come naturally to most blokes, that 'people watching' process, but I think it's likely to be fairly inspirational pretty quickly, given the right circumstances.

Sounds like a good excuse to go to some pubs and eateries as well, which is never a bad thing to have to do!

Good luck with your man-quest!

Cheers,

Itsallaguess

[Smautf]

What's the classic wardrobe for a (tall thin-ish) guy in his mid-forties?

Time to face facts: I have got two modes - smart (black suits, blue shirts) and scruffy (jeans, t-shirt, fleece) but rather useless at anything in-between. I need a very simple/easy/minimalist smart-casual wardrobe to blend in, not stand out (here and in the US). So two DAK 'direct answer' questions:

1. Is there a simple style guide anyone can recommend?
2. Is there a particular store (or stores) where I should shop?

I say that as someone who hates shopping and isn't interested in clothes in the slightest, but I do need to sharpen up and I recognise that I need help.

Any tips gratefully received!

N.

I type as a tall-ish, thin-ish fellow, also in his mid(dish)-40s. (5' 11" / 12 stone / 46)

I work in, loosely, the creative industries, so until fairly recently I didn't even have your smart mode. However, I came to a similar realisation after I turned 40, and so have been implementing "Operation Dress Like A Grown-Up" for a few years...

There are various online shops / brands / suppliers that I have used with some success. For example, Spoke sell chino-styled trousers at various points on the smart / casual spectrum and these come in a variety of cuts depending on your build. I buy their slimmest Style A and they work pretty well. I also like to see what designers like Oliver Spencer, Folk and Albam have in their range when I am looking for new clothes. These are well-made and distinctive without being outrageously styled and, whilst not cheap, compare reasonably well with high street options. Actual high street options that I use with a fair amount of confidence are Cos, Jigsaw (whose men's range is surprisingly good) and the Japanese chains Uniqlo and Muji (both fairly inexpensive). You do need to be within reach of a physical shop for these last two as they don't have their whole range online.

Mr Porter (pricey) and End Clothing (a bit less so) are huge online retailers with wide ranges and friendly return policies which are worth exploring.

I also read a few menswear blogs and you might like to browse some of these. I did not previously have any huge interest in clothes but, as is often the case, once I started reading around the subject I was drawn in, and now quite enjoy finding out more (and having a quiet snicker at some of the prices and some of the dafter options).

These recent articles on Put This On might be useful as they also contain lots of links and pictures :

http://putthison.com/five-starting-plac ... -wardrobe/
http://putthison.com/five-starting-plac ... -part-two/

The blog is American but not all the clothes mentioned are.

Another American blog that I like is https://dieworkwear.com

I can also recommend looking at :

https://www.permanentstyle.com (mostly formal and bespoke and therefore expensive but lots of good principles for dressing well and some casual clothes, too)

http://www.greyfoxblog.com (specifically aimed at the older man)

https://welldresseddad.com (more focussed on denim and workwear but engagingly written)

Hope that's useful !

Chris

[PinkDalek]

Since I stopped working, my wardrobe has consisted of jackets and trousers, plus supplementary outer wear, raincoat, waterproof jacket, light jacket and fleece. ...

The dapper TJH, as so described in the recent Fool Social thread, by Lootman I believe.

[neversay]

Chris (@Smautf) thanks for your tips and links which I will explore. Thank you too for your empathy - I was starting to feel a bit pathetic imagining all the dapper well groomed Lemon Fools!

All - I'm humbled, and inspired, by your kind responses to, as @Itsallaguess says, my 'man-quest'!

N.

[Julian]

What's the classic wardrobe for a (tall thin-ish) guy in his mid-forties?

Time to face facts: I have got two modes - smart (black suits, blue shirts) and scruffy (jeans, t-shirt, fleece) but rather useless at anything in-between. I need a very simple/easy/minimalist smart-casual wardrobe to blend in, not stand out (here and in the US). So two DAK 'direct answer' questions:

1. Is there a simple style guide anyone can recommend?
2. Is there a particular store (or stores) where I should shop?

I say that as someone who hates shopping and isn't interested in clothes in the slightest, but I do need to sharpen up and I recognise that I need help.

Any tips gratefully received!

N.

One comment to maybe make it feel less daunting is that you don't necessarily need to change everything all at once. You could start from your existing "scruffy (jeans, t-shirt, fleece)" look and move a step at a time from there.

Just changing the t-shirt for a simple plain casual shirt (e.g. one of the way too many options here - https://www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/men/tops/casual-shirts) would up the formality one notch from scruffy and maybe buy you a month reprieve from your wife "badgering <you> to go shopping". Bed into that look for a few weeks or months and then change something else to move another step further from scruffy (and hopefully get another month's reprieve ). For that second step perhaps swap jeans for chinos or the fleece for knitwear (e.g. what is called a shawl cardigan such as the one Daniel Craig wore in Quantum of Solace although those can be tricky if you are too thin - https://bamfstyle.files.wordpress.com/2 ... -main1.jpg).

One other tip on the warmth/fleece thing. If the temperature is somewhere between shirt and shirt-plus-fleece level then don't ignore the option of wearing a long sleeve vest under a shirt (e.g. https://www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/product/me ... sleeve2414). Multiple thinner layers can be useful.

In answer to your question 2, personally I'm a fan of Uniqlo (as you might have guessed from my links) as far as simple, unfussy, cheap, consistent and decent quality clothing is concerned. In the UK they are very focussed around Central London. I'm not sure how widespread the stores are in the USA although I know that they have NYC stores (edit - here's the US list https://www.uniqlo.com/us/en/find-stores/).

Also, don't forget about shoes. Open-laced shoes (called Derbys in the UK and Bluchers in the US I believe) are considered less formal than closed-laced (Oxford) shoes and suede considered less formal than leather. Shades of brown or tan are also considered less formal than black.

- Julian

[dspp]

All - I'm humbled, and inspired, by your kind responses to, as @Itsallaguess says, my 'man-quest'!

N.

Where I started working we always dressed for dinner ! On moving to rigs I therefore plumped for jeans and ran t-shirts into the ground, mixed with gore-tex and fleece. These days as an MD I have to dress to interface with clients and so I empathise with your needs. I see you are currently wanting to do the preppy look !

A suggestion if I may, which has worked for me. Get a good quality mid/lightweight (suit) jacket. The Brits don't actually do these very well in their home market, so maybe take inspiration from these
https://www.elcorteingles.es/moda/hombr ... s/?level=1

(I have just had look on Burberry and Gieves aka Thieves and Sharks and don't see the same stuff, but that just means they hide it from their UK audience). Personally I very seldom use a blazer.

Then get yourself a good quality pair of leather shoes, probably brown. Personally I prefer short boots, here is an example
https://www.johnlewis.com/de/bertie-cla ... n/p3389391
or if you really want to treat yourself try some brogues from here (very nice, still my #1 shoes after almost twenty years)
https://www.carminashoemaker.com/men-shoes

The point is that you can then team these two good quality items with all manner of shirts, chinos, slacks, jeans, tie or no tie, jumper, cardigan, etc. to suit a very wide variety of occasions. Work, social, leisure, travel. And just as importantly you can do it in a wide variety of climates. You can then work into a variety of styles to suit your life. Using black shoes backs yourself into a style corner by the way.

The better the quality of the jacket, the better it will cope with being rolled up and stuffed in a bag without creasing. At a guess say £300 should be bombproof. Mine lives in my briefcase quite happily without creasing.

Going this route forces you to think about dressing. You can relax back into jeans and fleece any time, but I think that is what you are trying to get away from.

regards, dspp

[PinkDalek]

... These days as an MD I have to dress to interface with clients and so I empathise with your needs. …

Then get yourself a good quality pair of leather shoes, probably brown. ...

Not in the City of London though, unless that has been relaxed. Perhaps people also wear hipster beards nowadays.

As for your aka re Gieves & Hawkes, apparently they are cheaper without the label.

[dspp]

Fortunately I don't do the City, except on my terms, and I have objected to black shoes as being uniform ever since I left.

Gieves are (or were) actually very good tailors, but since my kit is still going strong I'm not looking to buy any. The Chinese bought them recently I was told. Fenwicks can be good but you have to look at the fabric carefully. Jaeger no longer do the quality they used to so I don't know what I am going to do when my old coat expires, which it will do soon as I don't think it will make it to its next relining*.

Good kit does cost money. It is worth keeping your eye out for sales and thinking about what might work for you, and not being afraid to say when you get it wrong.

regards, dspp

* (recs for good 3/4 length lined/unlined/removable trench coats helpful)

[greenrobbie]

Online retailers: I'm an older man, and since the demise of nearly all high street gents outfitters, I purchase online from:

Peter Christian quite stylish with a small degree of eccentricity
Joseph Turner similar idea slightly more conventional - and possibly a little more expensive. Both have regular sales.

They both sell shoes by Loake Shoemakers, which are also available in a few of their own high street outlets, and also in John Lewis. I find a massive difference in quality from their premium 1880 range to the cheaper ones made in India, and would always go for the more expensive ones. They also have an outlet store on eBay. Loakes shoes in the 1880 range are perhaps at the sweet spot for quality/price. Better shoes are available, but substantially more expensive.

(Sorry, couldn't post links, but Google will be your friend)

[UncleEbenezer]

Chris (@Smautf) thanks for your tips and links which I will explore. Thank you too for your empathy - I was starting to feel a bit pathetic imagining all the dapper well groomed Lemon Fools!
N.

Well, you can stop that forthwith!

I've been recognised by fellow-fools on a three-word self-description: look for the beard, paunch and sandals. With whatever is comfortable. In the case of hawaiian shirts, the louder the better